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  • Writer's pictureKaren Lee

The best pick-up line of all time (no, really)*

Updated: May 18, 2020

I have discovered a pick-up line so good, it would put Matthew Hussey out of a job. Regardless of your gender identity or sexual orientation, I promise you that the target of your affection will be powerless with this line. Are you ready?

A long, long time ago... (2016)

On a little blog called Into the Gloss...

They featured an article on our lord and saviour, Hermione Granger, AKA Emma Watson. She showed us everything she uses in her beauty routine. But one product stood out above all the others. I swore that ONE DAY when I could afford it (and get it shipped to me from the US).

Because how could I resist a product that she uses "anywhere from the ends of [her] hair to [her] eyebrows to [her] pubic hair." Who knew that there were even beauty products dedicated to one's undercarriage?!

I must obtain this magical pubic potion.

By default, I have no filter. So of course, things just crop up in conversation that most people would consider "weird", like skincare. Next thing that comes out of my mouth is "I have the same stuff Emma Watson uses on her pubes!"

Who wouldn't be curious?

What a conversation starter!

Of course you can use a variation that's a little more eloquent:

"My pubes are pettibly soft, just like Emma Watson's."

Incorporate a pun even:

"I know the key to Hermione's Chamber of Secrets."

"I believe you might be able to find Hermione's secret pubic potion back in my Room of Requirement."

No pubes? No problem!

Remember, this is a multi-use product, so just sub in whatever patch of hair you have on your body and brag away!

But for real, I have an unprecedented success rate (in at least, piquing a person's interest) in using this lil tidbit.

Let me know what you think below! Would this line work on you?

* Your mileage may vary. Results may also vary on one's opinion of Emma Watson.

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